I took a deep breath and close my eyes, feels the air got into my lungs and told my self “Okay darling, sadly you still alive.”
I walk around at my past, just to make sure that it actually happens.
The truth is I let myself fall into the deep dark hole.
They used to love me right now, they used to support me no matter what I’ve been.
But they’re not; cause no one understand; they don’t really care.
They keep telling me “I’m here.”; but on the other side they pushing me away.
It’s like they giving me a dozen of flowers today, but the other day they sending me a bottle of poison.
It’s scary, you know.
To realize that you have no one to talk to when youre in your hardest time of your life.
Its sad to understand that- you know; you’re ALONE. I repeat. YOU’RE ALONE.
This year is the hardest.
Beside of the loneliness I have felt, lets talk about how scared I am.
I don’t want to fall in love again, like I’m so done with man.
I don’t want to fall in love with someone or date them, everyone is taking me for granted like “I want you today, but if someday I got bored, I will leave you alone.”
Do you see my problem?
I feel so desperately lonely, and I don’t even want to fall in love all over again; its tiring you know?
Feel love and butterflies until they get bore and then they will bring you down and-BOOM.
Remember my words okay, whoever you are.
TRUST NO ONE, even your closest family, cause everybody is going to kill you.